At Adam Foster Fine Jewelry, our take on this question is refreshingly straightforward. Traditionally, the wedding band goes on first, as it is nearest to the heart, with the engagement ring following on after. But what really matters here is what feels right for you and your unique love story.
That balance between old-school tradition and doing your own thing is a common debate in our studio. Rings carry deep meaning, but they're also meant to be worn with comfort and a sense of joy. So go ahead and do things your way, even if that means breaking with the norm.
Where the Tradition Came From
The idea of wearing rings on the left ring finger has a seriously long history. The ancient Romans believed a vein actually ran straight from the fourth finger on the left hand to the heart. They called it the vein of love, and though we've since found out that isn't actually true, the symbolism stuck around.
Eventually, the left-hand ring finger became the accepted spot for symbols of love, which is how engagement rings and wedding bands ended up there in the first place. During the wedding ceremony, the wedding band goes on first, to symbolise commitment and partnership. After that, the engagement ring goes back onto the same finger, on top of the wedding band.
That's the 'tradition' most people talk about.
Wedding Band First or Engagement Ring First? It’s Up to You!
So which one goes on first in everyday life? The wedding ring sits closer to the heart, with the engagement ring resting on top. That makes sense, since marriage is usually seen as the foundation of any relationship, and the engagement ring is a promise that led to that.
Of course, not everyone agrees. Lots of people prefer to put the engagement ring on first. Some do this simply because it looks better that way with their engagement ring design. Others do it for comfort, aesthetics, or because it just feels more meaningful to them. And some decide to only wear engagement rings on special occasions, while keeping their wedding rings on all the time.
There's no one right or wrong answer here. It's all about what feels right for you.
Getting Your Engagement Rings and Wedding Bands to Work Together
When you've got a ring set that's been custom-designed to work together, the order often makes sense. A simple solitaire engagement ring paired with a straightforward wedding band will sit beautifully in either direction. If you've got more dramatic designs involved, one way might look better than the other.
That's where working with clever jewelers who understand how rings sit on the finger really comes in handy. In our Frontenac studio, we often try on rings in different positions and then see how they feel rather than just guessing.
At the end of the day, it's all about what feels comfortable, looks good, and fits your personal style rather than what tradition says.
What Happens On the Wedding Day
On the big day, the engagement ring is usually swapped over to the right hand for a bit, which lets the wedding band be placed right on the left ring finger during the ceremony. Afterward, the engagement ring goes back into its usual spot. Some couples decide to leave the engagement ring on the right hand all the time, while others like to mix it up depending on the occasion.
Wearing Rings On Different Fingers or Hands
While the left hand is where things are usually done, loads of people wear their rings on a different finger or even on the right hand. In some cultures, the right ring finger is actually the norm for wedding bands. And lots of people switch between the two hands depending on what they're doing, such as work, travel, or special occasions.
After all, the meaning of the rings doesn't change, no matter where you wear them.
Modern Couples and Personal Choice
Modern couples are really into making intentional choices when it comes to their jewelry. They ask questions and care about things like design, ethics, and whether the rings fit well with their lifestyle. Whether your ring features a lab-grown diamond or a natural stone, or whether it's bold and eye-catching or understated, the important thing is that it reflects who you are.
And the question of which goes first becomes less and less important as you get to the heart of what makes the rings special to you.
Practical Considerations
There are a few things to think about when it comes to how you wear your rings. Resizing is one, especially if you're planning on wearing your rings all the time. Some people choose to solder their rings together for added security. Others prefer a bit of flexibility.
The design of your engagement ring setting will also impact how well the rings sit together. Low-profile designs sit really close to the finger, so pair up easily with wedding bands. More sculptural settings might need a bit more thought and a special kind of wedding band to get the look right.
These are just a couple of the things you might want to chat about with a jeweler before you make a decision.
Rings As Symbols, Not Rules
At the end of the day, engagement rings and wedding rings are all about love, commitment, and the story you're telling as a couple. Whether you wear engagement rings every day, or just on special occasions, whether you wear wedding bands alone or stacked up, it's all about intention, not order.
Your rings should make your life easier, not add to the stress.
FAQs
Which goes first, the engagement ring or the wedding ring?
Traditionally, a wedding band is worn first on your left hand with the engagement ring following soon after, but let's be real: personal preference should always be the top priority.
What’s the reason we use the left hand for engagement and wedding rings?
This tradition has been around for ages, and it all stems from an old belief in the vena amoris or “vein of love,” which was thought to connect the fourth finger on your left hand right up to your heart.
Can I ever wear my engagement ring on my right hand?
Absolutely. Loads of people wear their engagement rings on the right hand, either temporarily or permanently.
Do I have to wear both on the same finger?
No, some people wear them on different fingers or even on different hands. It's all about what feels comfortable for you and your lifestyle.
What if my rings don't quite fit together right?
If your rings don't fit well together, a jeweler can help design a wedding band that looks nice with your engagement ring, or even just adjust the fit by resizing it or coming up with a custom design.
What about modern couples? Is there a rule to follow?
Truth is, there is no one rule. Modern couples often just go with what feels right for them and means something to them.
Can I wear an eternity ring along with my engagement and wedding rings?
Absolutely, you can, and loads of people do. Eternity rings are often worn alongside wedding bands to mark special milestones like anniversaries.
Does the order in which I'm wearing my rings mess with the symbolism?
The symbolism of the rings is actually about the commitment, and not about the order in which they're worn.
Finding what feels right for you
At Adam Foster Fine Jewelry, we think rings should always be about the people wearing them, which means taking a look at tradition, giving a nod to the symbolism, and then choosing something that feels right for your life and your love story.
Whether you stick with the traditional way of doing things or create your own little ring-wearing rhythm, the main thing is that your rings feel like they belong to you. When that happens, they're no longer just a bit of jewelry; they become a part of your story.